Pride or Confidence I am very passionate about music, whether it is playing piano, sax, or composing. I have worked and studied hard to improve the craft and when I perform, I am prepared to give the best performance that I can give not only to the audience that I performing for but to my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. I believe what I am exhibiting is the passion and confidence in my performances and my work. Over the past years of playing in the church environment, I have often been accused of being prideful. Interesting, I have never had any accusations of this kind while playing in the non-church environment. I begin looking at each situation and the people involved and I began to understand why this issue appears be more prevalent in the church setting than in the non-church setting. First I want to define pride and confidence.
Pride- a feeling or deep pleasure or satisfaction derived from one’s own achievements, the achievements of those with whom one is closely associated, or from qualities or possessions that are widely admired. The quality of having an excessively high opinion of oneself or one’s importance. (arrogance, conceit, egotism, vanity, vainglory)
Confidence-the state of feeling certain about the truth of something. A feeling of self-assurance arising from one’s appreciation of one’s own abilities or qualities. (self-assurance, self-confidence, self-possession, assertivness, boldness, courage, conviction, mettle, nerve)
I believe there are basically 3 reasons why I have encountered these experiences in the church environment especially in the area of music and they are: 1. superficial relationships. 2. People do not know or understand the difference between pride and confidence. 3. They have a "religious mine set". Many times I have examined myself to see if these accusations are true as well as seeking council from people whom I have developed a close friendship and relationship with as well as being accountable to. What I have discoverd is the people who make these accusations usually lack self-confidence and tend to compare themselves with others, when they do not measure up it sets the stage for envy. They are often place in a leadership position because of their talent and availability lacking the training and knowledge about the position. Just because you can sing or play an instrument good does not make you a good leader. Because of immaturity, insecurity, they will feel threatened and intimidated by someone who is confident and/or more knowledgeable than they are therefore calling it pride. They will never admit to these shortcomings for they are afraid of being transparent and honest not only with others, but with themselves as well, which is pride. They will often justify themselves by using "religious speak" and will misuse and abuse their leadership position to their advantage in order to make the confident person believe they have a problem by fabricating "religious false accusations".
We often hear the word “fellowship” but what does that mean? For most people “fellowship” is relationships based upon a few hours on Sunday morning and occasional church functions. Hi, Bye, God bless you, we miss you etc. But when a situation occurs where one honesty and integrity is questioned or there is a misunderstanding, it is very easy to make assumptions and false accusations based upon limited knowledge and understanding as well as the lack of accountability to each other, which grows out of deeper level of fellowship or relationship. To obtain a deeper relationship it will require spending time and communication to really get to know the person in both their strengths and weaknesses. This is level where “iron sharpens iron” Proverbs 27:17, and the relationship is based on trust, honesty, openness, acceptance, maturity and accountability. Unfortunately, most people are comfortable with superficial relationships. Ray Baker / Producer Copyright 08/05/09